The GOP came a callin...
The GOP called me yesterday. They wanted money, of course. And, of course, I told them “no” and exactly why the answer is “no.” This is a paraphrased version of how the conversation went.
Me: “Hello”So, the GOP actually has a script full of lies that they’re using as a way to raise funds. That’s just lovely. My party really sucks right now. too bad there’s nowhere else to go…
GOP Phone Banker (Obviously reading from script): “Hello Mr. Kernel. This is Todd calling on behalf of President Bush and the Republican Party.”
Me: “Uh huh.”
GOP Phone Banker: “I’m calling you today to tell you how the left is planning an anti-war advertising attack. The Republican Party is making these calls in hopes that you, Mr. Kernel, will be able to support us in our efforts to counter their attacks.”
Me: “Uh huh.”
GOP Phone Banker: “Mr. Kernel, could you please write us a check today? As little as $100 will go a long way!
Me: “I’ll not contribute another cent to the GOP until it stops pandering to the illegal alien lobby and enacts restrictive immigration reform. I’m tired of hearing President Bush promote his “plan,” which is nothing short of an amnesty.”
SOUND OF PAGES BEING TURNED IS HEARD
GOP Phone Banker: “Mr. Kernel, President Bush does not support illegal immigration, blah, blah, blah, blah…”
Voices in my head: “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, etc.”
GOP Phone Banker: …blah, blah, blah, blah. So, Mr. Kernel, as you can see, President Bush’s plan will not benefit illegal aliens, in fact, it will go a long way toward easing this situation. So, about that $100.”
Me: “Listen, I don’t appreciate being lied to, and you very well may believe that you aren’t lying, but I understand this issue…surely better than anyone who has to read from a script about it does. So, let me tell you, you’re being led to tell lies about this, which is horribly unethical on the part of your bosses. I’ll repeat, as long as the GOP heads down this path, they’ll get nothing from me. Nothing. Tell your bosses that it will be fine to call back when I see the good and restrictive immigration plank from 1984 back in the platform in place of that pandering, neocon drivel that was there last year.”
Flustered GOP Phone Banker: “Well, Mr. Kernel, thank you for your time anyway. According to FEC rules, I have to tell you, blah, blah blah, etc. Have a nice day.”
Me: “Click.”
